Well yesterday i tried to fast. But the girl im living with made me go out with her for lunch so i was forced to eat something.
But i was good. All i ate yesterday was half a salad. Unfortunitaly than i went out and got on the piss with an empty stomach. And of course knowing me i never know when enough is enough and i got completely shit faced and ended up calling the night to an end early, going back to my mates place and chucking my guts up. lovely...
Today i had a mega hang over so of course i ate like a horse. I really want more food but im going to try and not eat anything else. Ive already had two low fat cookies and more than a handful of doritos..err what was i thinking? I also had a tuna salad roll and 2x miso soup - blow out!
Tomorrow i will try and fast again. Im moving into my new place tomorrow and working so i should be able to keep my mind off food. I really dying to know how much i weigh and if all this alcahol is making me fat.
Ive got another date with handsome man on saturday. He seems really keen, but im to scared to trust him. I cant understand why such a gorgeous looking man would be interested in me? What do i have to give seriously?
Nothing is the answer. And he's full big on eating right and not drinking or doing drugs. So i feel so inadiquit around him! I have terrible eating issues! I binge hard out than some days dont eat anything at all...thats not healthy. He said he pigged out massively and he had 3 plates of sushi...wtf? And i LOVE drinking! Adore it! And use to be a dirty junkie. (well not really a junkie but ...well yes actually i cant deny it).
I dunno im just scared he's gonna look at me and say your not skinny or pretty enough to be my trophy girlfriend. Cause i swear to god he looks like he should date thoughs ano fashionable pretty girls i want to be :( Im scared im going to let myself like him and he'll fuck me over just as the last 6 guys have. Errr....
Must not eat!
Must be skinny & pretty!