hey this is just a quick post to say three things
1. i didnt go and see the doc yesterday. i had an appoitment all booked but i cancelled. I can deal with this myself im a big girl!
2. i saw my ex last night. after wanting so bad not to see him, i saw him ....with his Ex! And get this they were waiting at the same bus stop as me, they got on the same bus as me AND they fucking got off at the same bus stop as me! WTF!?
We pretended like we didnt know each other, but secretly i was happy. I looked pretty and skinny and im sure his gf would've scoped me outat least once. I wanna give her some jealousy, something to think about but in all honestly they probs just ignored me!
The thing is i dunno if im in shock, or i just dont care. Normally i would hope this makes him wanna call me blar blar blar but i dont, not this time. I hope he doesnt call me! I still hate him with every cell in my body, but i think im finally getting over him. At least thats the story im sticking to!
3. The biggest and best news. All i ate yesteday was
- a peice of toast
- and one nectorean
Heck yes! And i was hungry and i wanted food and i was just like 'no lovely me' and i didnt! so proud of myself!
Im still sad, i still had a lil teary on my pillow last night for about 30seconds last night and to be honest the thought of taking my life did cross my mind breifly again but im keeping these thoughts at bay. I know they're still there lurking in the shadows. I know it'll rear its ugly head again soon, but for the moment im okay. ...and i like that.
No men in my life, no new clothes, i dont like my new haircut and im getting a dirty disgusting coldsore....but for the moment im okay....and i like that.